We moved house about a month ago. With 2 kids under 4, we were so grateful to leave behind the home so heavily abused by mucky fingers, smoothie spillages (have you any idea how impossible they are to rectify?!) and weirdly, a family of ladybirds (but that's another story).
In the sitting room, we left the rug behind. Not out of kindness, but out of embarrassment. Beneath the rug lay the results of a turquoise crayon being tread into the carpet over a period of 2 weeks.
The day we moved in, I sighed with pleasure at the wooden floors throughout the ground floor. Smoothies, do your worst - I will defeat you with my trusty mop. Upstairs on the other hand, is fitted with a clean carpet. A clean CREAM carpet. No matter, I thought. We'll be spending most of our time downstairs, going upstairs only to sleep - no food allowed.
It turns out there are things upstairs far more damaging than a smoothie. A couple of weeks ago, I paid the penalty for bringing my youngest son into bed with me at dawn, and accidentally dozing off. I was awoken an hour later by his grinning face, and his green fingers. No, he had not been re-potting house plants. If only, soil I could deal with.
Number 2 son had meticulously covered a 2 metre square area of cream carpet with hundreds of green lines. Even in my horror, my eye was drawn to what looked like an attempt at a pattern. My brief glimmer of pride was quickly overtaken with horror. After 2 hours of scrubbing I managed to diminish only a quarter.
My sons are very pleased with their new rug.
This morning, a further assault was committed against the floor coverings of our new house. As I applied jet black liquid eyeliner to each of my lids, I looked down to see the tiny little pot of liquid had been dashed to the floor.
Interestingly, approximately 5 minutes prior to this incident I wondered just how much liquid liner there could be left in such a tiny container. The answer: Plenty. More than enough in fact.
Methinks another trip to the rug shop is on the cards.
(Now playing on the iPod: So Long, Frank Lloyd Wright - Simon & Garfunkel)